Monday, April 13, 2015

Moments in time


It's been over two weeks now since the dizzyness has taken over my every moment. Those first five days were the worst. The icky naseau illness won and I was bedridden for the most part. If it hadn't been for our trip to Texas, I might still be in bed. The trip was hard and at times I felt ill and stayed in bed, but it also forced me to participate when I could. I was able to capture tiny moments with my family. Precious moments that my mommy brain may too soon forget but my children will savor for a long, long, time.

That first day back at work, I was nervous. It was a lot of work to stay steady, to keep from weaving, to bend over to tie shoes without fainting, to push small humans on the swings, to stay calm and in control. But I did it. I came home spent. Mentally, physically and I think I was in bed before seven p.m. Yet, I felt like I defeated something. I was not going to be beaten by my wacky ear, brain, whatever issues. Life is too short. It's too full of special moments I don't want to miss. I am having way too much fun in these moments to waste them away feeling sick and sorry for myself.

So, I got the eyes checked. There was a significant change. I ordered new specs. Maybe it will make a difference. We will see. This week we get the ears checked and check in with neurology. Hoping for answers. Yet, I am coping. I know that I don't like living like this, but I will survive. 
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