I spoke briefly on the phone with a friend this morning. I am sure you all know me well enough by now to know that I am rarely at a loss for words. Yet, I feel like I just couldn't find anything worth saying to her. I had that feeling way down deep in the pit of me. The only word I can use to describe it is guilt.
You see, my friend is battling the bully. Yep, it's the C word again. It seems to almost be a household name around here. Even my daughter said, "Mom, it's a sad summer, everyone has cancer."
Everytime someone new gets into the club (this is one I hope you never join), I feel guilt. Why am I still here and others gone? Why is it so hard for some and relatively painless for others? Why, when I am assumably an expert on this issue, do I have nothing to say?
It hard being on the other side. It isn't fun. I don't like it. I wish I could be more helpful. I need to pray about this.