Wednesday, April 25, 2007
9 years have passed already
Today is my anniversary. 9 years. Every year gets better and better. If I only knew way back then what we would encounter in our lives... I remember wondering what we would have to talk about after being together for so long. The thought of two beautiful children and one more on the way, cancer and many other obstacles never even crossed my niave little mind. Now, even more than ever, I am so in love with this man; I can hardly describe it.
The night before my thoracotomy I was scared. I feared for my life. I sat down and wrote letters to my husband, my children and my mother. It seems silly now, that I thought I wouldn't make it through the surgery. I did, and I thank the Lord for His amazing blessings on me every single day. Happy Anniversary, Honey. I love you the most, impossible!
Dear love of my life,
I have been so blessed to have you in my life. You are my best friend, my comforter. I love you so much.Our lives have changed so much since those first few years when I felt I could not go an hour or a moment without hearing your voice or holding your hand. I remember your soft touch and loving embrace when my father died, I remember you saying “I love you” for the first time. We have made it through so much, the birth of our children, the death of your grandfather, my father and grandfather. We have been to so many family weddings and celebrations I cannot even count them. There have been dark times, times when I thought we would not go on, but we did. You are always so strong and determined. Each time we have been able to forgive each other and move on. I want you to know that you are so much a part of me that I wonder how I may go on without you. If the Lord has chosen this to be my time, I will take a part of you with me. I will hold on to the love that we have shared for so many years and use it to guide me to heaven.You are an amazing man. You have so many strengths and talents. You are such a wonderful father to our children. Keep showing them the world like you do and sharing new experiences with them everyday. I love the way dd can be crying and you say something to her and she immediately breaks out in laughter. It is as if you know exactly how to make her happy. Ds admires you so much. He aspires to be just like you. He just needs someone to hold his hand as he takes those leaps into every new adventure. I hope that you can do that for him. I know that they will be amazing children because they have you as a father. You are so good at making things work, every time I was sure something was broken for good you came along and fixed it. I wish I had that knack. I mean, really who can buy a 25-year-old motorcycle for $20 and have it running in 24 hours? You can. You have put your blood, sweat, and tears into this home and it is perfect because of it. I will remember this house as our home forever. Thank you so much for your patience and kindness with my family and me. You have always been there when I needed you to be. My family is so important to me and you share that philosophy with me. Not all husbands would let their sister-in-law and her infant move in or allow a great grandfather to die in their home. Your family has been wonderful to us. I love being a part of a huge family. There is a massive amount of love and compassion that I can feel every time I need it. I am so blessed to have been a part of your life for as long as I have. I know that you will continue to bless those around you with your passion for life and your many, many talents. I know that this experience will only make you stronger and wiser and better prepared for the future. I know that you will become an even greater man and do many more wonderful and amazing things. I love you more than you could ever know.