Thursday, June 29, 2006

I have not been able to live without....

I cannot believe that I forgot to mention in yesterday's post how important my mother and my husband have been in this whole ordeal. Yesterday, my mom combed my hair and put my makeup on, she brought me a life long link to the world wide web, her laptop. She put lotion on my feet and my arms and my back. She made me feel beautiful in a very ugly place. You don't realize how important these small pleasures are, until you cannot perform them yourself.
My loving and caring husband has become my nurse and my confidant. He has gotten me whatever I needed and constantly helped me sit up and lay down, he has helped me brush my hair and my teeth, he has gotten the box of Kleenex so often, it is now a permanent fixture on my bed. He cleans up the room, takes care of visitors, keeps the nurses and doctors updated and only sleeps a few hours. If you have room on your prayer list, please add him. He has been an angel, and I know he has sacrificed much for me. He has missed ballgames, work, the children and time with his family. He is an amazing man and I feel blessed that he is a part of my life.
Yesterday was a big day and I was exhausted. I had a lot of visitors and it was a joy to speak with all of them. I am so blessed. My husband took the kids home and had to check on the dog and the baby pheasants, I forgot to keep you updated....We had two fly the roost the day before surgery. We were keeping them in a cardboard box and when we checked on them Monday night, two were gone. No trace of them anywhere. They have been using their wings to jump up and perhaps they broke out and an animal carried them off, there was not even a feather left in the garage. Also, on Sunday, our 30+ year old freezer died. I was able to save most of the meat, except the deer. I completely forgot about it till just now, that is going to me one dirty job when we get to it, maybe we should call that guy from the Discovery Channel.

I had a couple of evening visitors last night, it was very nice to be able to chat. I was pretty tired and hope I kept composed. I sort of remember asking everyone if they wanted to see the insicion, I am not sure that that would have been in everyone's best interest, but hey, it's the meds talking, right?

I slept better than I have in days, almost seven hours last night. I woke up with a cough every now and then, but I have been doing that for several months, so I am used to it. My hubby was up too late again, I faintly remember him still on the internet at midnight or so. This computer is my therapy but it can be my enemy too, it drains us of our needed rest. I am addicted, and the first step is admitting the problem, "I am an internet junkie!"

We are anxious to talk to the doctors today. We are anticipating getting off of the epidural and going to a button pain reliever. I will have to be able to manage my pain before we can leave, along with a few other requirements...ahem.....bowel movements etc.

I have a garden of beautiful flowers to remind me of all your support, I appreciate your visits, calls, emails, candles, books, lotion, balloons, teddy bears, photos (thanks mom), gifts and boxes of chocolate. It has been one of my goals to make sure that you are all getting accurate information and passing it along. I hope that I can be successful in squelching rumors and fears about my condition this way. I have been very lucky thus far. The pathology report is rumored to be coming today, I will update as soon as I can.

I almost forgot, my wonderful and amazing mother was able to reach my half brother, whom I have not heard from in years, last night. We had a great phone conversation and we traded email addresses so I hope to continue our communication. We are so blessed with technology these days, we have no excuse not to keep in touch with our loved ones. One of the things this whole experience has done for me is put into perspective where my priorities should be. I understand how important my family is and how blessed I am to have children and brothers and sisters, and let's not forget friends........the superglue of my life.
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